To play this game in your web browser, you need to have the Flash plugin installed and active.

GET FLASH <--

If you think that it's already installed but you're still seeing this text instead of the game, it may not be active.
FIREFOX: Go to the "addons" settings (ctrl-shift-A), and if you see "Shockwave Flash" on the list, set it to "Ask to activate" instead of "Never activate", then reload this page.
GOOGLE CHROME: Go to chrome://settings (copy that into your address bar). Scroll down to "advanced" on the bottom. Open "Content settings", find "Flash", and switch it to "Ask first" instead of "Block sites from running Flash". Then reload this page.
INTERNET EXPLORER: Click the gear icon on the top right, and select "Manage add-ons". You should see "Shockwave Flash Object" on the list. Select it, and in the bottom right, hit "Enable", and then reload this page.
MICROSOFT EDGE: Click the "..." button on the top right, click "settings" on the bottom, scroll down to find he "View advanced settings" button, and toggle "Use Adobe Flash Player" to on.
OTHER: I dunno. Google it.

If you're trying to play this on a phone, you probably can't.

Conan O'brien the Barbarian

!This is old - my newest game is Swarm Queen!
Conan O'brien the Barbarian whacks things with his giant head.
Really, that's all he does for the entire game. (Sorry.)

CONTROLS:

[LEFT/RIGHT ARROWS] Walk around.
[SPACE BAR] Headbutt. (Even in mid-air.)
[DOWN ARROW] Duck. (Makes you invincible. Even in mid-air.)
Ducking stops your movement, so don't do it over a pit.
[right click] optins / quit / skip levels

Production Notes: This is less of a game, and more of a joke that goes on too long.
I thought of this at 4am and proceeded to create this "game" during my first week of College. (there wasn't a lot to do yet)